Wednesday, March 25, 2009

March is Almost Over

I like to state the obvious. So yes, March is almost over and what the hell have I been doing with myself? I'm more than halfway done with my Spring semester. In mid-May I will have completed my first year of graduate school. Wow. It's been an interesting journey, but I guess I'll talk about that after I successfully COMPLETE my first year.

What else is happening... work is the same. A bit more going on which is OK I guess. I like doing nothing for work but I guess if I can do some meaningful crap then, that's good too I guess. Hmm. The commuting does suck though. I fill my tank two to three times a week. AND speaking of driving...

I am finally in a relationship. It feels weird and foreign to me. I'm not sure how to act or how to feel or what's appropriate or what's out of line or what's normal. I feel all awkward and insecure and unsure of what's supposed to happen. All this newness is kind of fun I guess, but mostly it's just confusing and maybe a bit stressful. I like the guy and I LIKE being in a relationship with him, but it's still just all so new to me. Anyway, he lives like 50 miles from my house which is why I mentioned the driving thing. It's a pretty crappy drive but it's not too bad. I've driven from his apt to school TWICE already, and it's 75 miles from his place to school. And then after school is over, it's 40 miles home. UGH shoot me.

But it's worth it I guess. We'll see. In the beginning of the relationship, I think I was more reluctant and he was more into it... and now that I'm more into it, I feel like he might be becoming more reluctant. Why is this so effing confusing? This is kind of why it takes me so long to like someone... because the moment I start investing, I start to lose it. Or feel like I'm about to lose it. Am I losing it?!

UGH.